(HeatonRotheray)

This table has four sturdy legs

And a heart of very near wild oak

When others would have screamed out loud my friend

This one never even spoke



I've been sat upon, I've been spat upon

I've been treated like a bed

Been carried like a stretcher,

when someone thinks they're dead

I've been dined upon, I've been wined upon

I've been taken for a fool

Taken for a desk,

when they should have been at school



This table's been pushed against the door

When tempers, well tempers flare at night

Banged upon with knuckles clenched my friend

When someone thinks that they are right



I've been sat upon, I've been spat upon

I've been treated like a bed

Been carried like a stretcher,

when someone thinks they're dead

I've been dined upon, I've been wined upon

I've been taken for a fool

Taken for a desk,

when they should have been at school



Tables only turn when tables learn

Put me on a bonfire, watch me burn

Treat me with some dignity, don't treat me like a slave

Or I'll turn into the coffin in your grave



I've been sat upon, I've been spat upon

I've been treated like a bed

Been carried like a stretcher,

when someone thinks they're dead

I've been dined upon, I've been wined upon

I've been taken for a fool

Taken for a desk,

when they should have been at school



Tables only turn when tables learn

Put me on a bonfire, watch me burn

Treat me with some dignity, don't treat me like a slave

Or I'll turn into the coffin in your grave