Woke up today

looking through my email

it's all triple x - explicit sex

But I'm not horny



Can't make it stop, the different colored soda pops

striped toe socks, call the cops

I can't take anymore



I've got the perfect cel plan with nights and weekends free

All the ringtones that I need

But no one ever calls me



I should paint myself green

Walk around in a red g-string

Cause I just don't fit in

Turn my hat sideways

put a band aid on my face

You know that I....

Wish I could start a trend



Checkin' out and in of the Paris Hilton

Joe Millionaire - he's a has been

Flippin' through a hundred million channels

But I still watch Road Rules

Lose the pounds FLIP

You gotta buy now FLIP

Here's the number to save your soul FLIP

Breaking news...another Michael Jackson scandal



I've got the perfect cel plan with nights and weekends free

More on-peak than I need

But no one ever calls me



I'll wear low rider jeans

Put a barbell through my dingaling

Cause I just don't fit in

Turn my hat sideways

put a band aid on my pretty face

Cause I wish, I know, I could....

I would start a trend



Nana nana na

Nana nana na

Nana nana na



Then there's my girlfriend

She's such a cutie

She'd be a beauty

If she could get an extreme makeover on that booty

I could bend her over and she let me spank it

Take off my jeans

The zipper pinched my dingaling

And I don't really fit in

Throw my hat away

Take that stupid band aid off my face

And I...I wish there were

One more way to tan your skin

a reality show where no one wins

If I would be myself

Then I would start a trend



If I'd just be myself






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