THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS

(Alan Sherman)



On the first day of Christmas,

My true love gave to me,

A Japanese transistor radio.



On the second day of Christmas,

My true love gave to me,

Green polka dot pajamas,

And a Japanese transistor radio.



(It's a Nakashuma.)



On the third day of Christmas,

My true love gave to me,

A calendar book with the name of my insurance man,

Green polka dot pajamas,

And a Japanese transistor radio.

(It's the Mark IV model. That's the one that's discontinued.)



On the fourth day of Christmas,

My true love gave to me,

A simulated alligator wallet,

A calendar book with the name of my insurance man,

Green polka dot pajamas,

And a Japanese transistor radio.



(And it comes in a Leatherette case with holes in it. So you could listen right

through the case.)



On the fifth day of Christmas,

My true love gave to me,

A statue of a lady with a clock where her stomach ought to be,

A simulated alligator wallet,

A calendar book with the name of my insurance man,

Green polka dot pajamas,

And a Japanese transistor radio.

(And it has a wire with a thing on one end that you could stick in your ear, an

d a thing on the other end that you can't stick anywhere because it's bent.)



On the sixth day of Christmas,

My true love gave to me,

A hammered aluminum nutcracker,

And all that other stuff,

And a Japanese transistor radio.



[Continue until . . . ]



On the twelfth day of Christmas,

Although it may seem strange;

On the twelfth day of Christmas,

I'm going to exchange:

An automatic vegetable slicer that works when you see it on television but not w

hen you get it home,

A chromium combination manicure scissors and cigarette lighter,

A pair of teakwood shower clogs,

An indoor plastic birdbath,

A pink satin pillow that says ''San Diego'' with fringe all around it,

A hammered aluminum nutcracker,

A statue of a lady with a clock where her stomach ought to be,

A simulated alligator wallet,

A calendar book with the name of my insurance man,

Green polka dot pajamas,

And a Japanese transistor radio.



@parody @Xmas @seasonal @gift

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