(spooner/evans)

Copyright 1975 pseudo songs and swiveltone music



What do you want from life

To kidnap an heiress

Or threaten her with a knife

What do you want from life

To get cable tv

And watch it every night



There you sit

A lump in your chair

Where do you sleep

And what do you wear

When you're sleeping



What do you want from life

An indian guru

To show you the inner light

What do you want from life

A meaningless love affair

With a girl that you met tonight



How can you tell when you're doin' alright

Does your bank account swell

While you're dreaming at night

How do know when you're really in love

Do violins play when you're touching the one

That you're loving



What do you want from life

Someone to love

And somebody that you can trust

What do you want from life

To try and be happy

While you do the nasty things

You must



Well, you can't have that, but if you're an american citizen you are entitled to:

A heated kidney shaped pool,

A microwave oven--don't watch the food cook,

A dyna-gym--i'll personally demonstrate it in the privacy of your own home,

A kingsize titanic unsinkable molly brown waterbed with polybendum,

A foolproof plan and an airtight alibi,

Real simulated indian jewelry,

A gucci shoetree,

A year's supply of antibiotics,

A personally autographed picture of randy mantooth

And bob dylan's new unlisted phone number,

A beautifully restored 3rd reich swizzle stick,

Rosemary's baby,

A dream date in kneepads with paul williams,

A new matador,

A new mastadon,

A maverick,

A mustang,

A montego,

A merc montclair,

A mark iv,

A meteor,

A mercedes,

An mg,

Or a malibu,

A mort moriarty,

A maserati,

A mac truck,

A mazda,

A new monza,

Or a moped,

A winnebago--hell, a herd of winnebago's we're giving 'em away,

Or how about a mcculloch chainsaw,

A las vegas wedding,

A mexican divorce,

A solid gold kama sutra coffee pot,

Or a baby's arm holding an apple?


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