Sittin' with the fat man

Tryin' to get a loan

Talkin' about horses

And the women that we've known



Spittin' on the sidewalk

Squintin' into the sun

Greetin' all the people

Smilin' at everyone



I said "Hey, listen, Fat Man

I just can't get a break

Must I pay my whole life long

For just one mistake?



"My brother's in the armed forces

My sister is in jail,

Won't you give me fifty dollars

So I can pay her bail?"



He said "You Can't Fool The Fat Man

No, you can't fool me

You're just a two-bit grifter

And that's all you'll ever be"